Every morning, I wake up to a great woman's devotional from Proverbs 31 Ministries to start my day. It's been a wonderful way for me to focus on God in the morning and really start my day off on a positive note. Often, the devotional I wake up to has a message or a verse that is so pertinent to what I've been dealing with in life, and I know that it's truly a word from God straight to me.
Today was one of those messages.
I am outwardly a confident person, but I have a lot of insecurities that I don't like to share. For the past few weeks, I can feel Satan really pulling at those insecurities and making them bigger in my mind, which is slowly tearing me apart. It's hard to focus on all the blessings and positive things that God is doing when I've got these negatives pulling at me in the back of my mind. Today's devotional talked about focusing on being thankful, even when all you can think of are the negatives, because when you thank God for what He's given you (even when it's only one or two things you can think of) He will multiply it and drive out your focus on the negatives.
Today, I am thankful for the following (and so much more than I know I've left out):
-Family who has been my biggest and loudest supporter in everything I have attempted - success or fail - and who has always driven me to try my best and reach for the stars. Also, for all the emotional/financial support they have given me over the past 6 years as I struggled through some hard times. I didn't deserve any of it, but they were always there no matter what.
-A relationship with H that I truly believe has been blessed by God. He has brought us together and continues to bless us as we focus on making Him the foundation of our life together. H is a man who is strong in his beliefs, and he supports and pushes me to be stronger in mine. God has given me a partner who wants the same things: to raise a family grounded in Christian teachings, to find a church that we can worship at together, and to support each other through love and prayer.
-A job that I still don't know how I got, but I am firmly believing God provided for me.
-A sister who I can call my best friend, no matter how much we argue or drive each other crazy.
-My church family and friends who support me through prayer, love, and fellowship.
-So so so much more!!
Today, I refuse to let Satan continue pulling at my insecurities. Darkness can not exist where God's light resides, and I am praying for more of God's light in my life so that Satan can not even get a glimpse at my doubts and insecurities. God has truly blessed me so much, and I need to focus on that and be thankful--my thoughts, my body, my heart all belong to Christ and Satan has NO power over them!! Amen!