When I was little, I can remember my Grammy sitting me on her lap and singing a song about friendship to me. She would smile as she sang, and it always made me feel so secure that the message of the song was true to life:
Make new friends
But keep the old;
One is silver
And the other, gold.
I always thought the words of the song were more about knowing that just because I meet new people doesn't mean that I should throw old friendships away. But as I grow older, I realize that maybe this isn't the the actual purpose of the song; maybe it's more about the quality of friendships, both old and new.
For 26 years, I lived within a 150-mile radius of my hometown. And for the first 21 of those years, I lived at my parents' house in my hometown. Same family, same friends, same scenery for 21 years. Yes, within those years friendships changed; the girl who was my best friend in kindergarten was not necessarily my best friend come senior year. But the girl who was my best friend all the way through elementary school and middle school was still a dear friend to me by the time graduation rolled around (probably based on our deep-rooted love of Barbies, Lisa Frank stickers, and boys who played the drums). Once I went away to college, I made new friends but still kept in touch (and to an extent, still continue to) with many of my closest friends from high school.
They say that the friends you make in college are the friends who stick around for life. I hope that's true. My sorority sisters, my classmates through my undergrad program - those are the ones that I hope stick around for the long haul. They know me, not as the little girl who played on the swingset and constantly changed my mind between loving Spice Girls or Mariah Carey more, but as the woman who took on leadership roles, who has a passion for teaching, and who gets a little silly when cranberry-vodka's are involved.
Two years ago, we moved 450 miles away from our hometowns and 600 miles away from the college town we'd called home for 6 years. No college friends, no high school friends. No one that I knew at all. And so the adventure of making new friends began while somehow trying to balance keeping the old from so far away.
Unfortunately, as I'm finding, making new friends who are as good as the silver from the song is tougher than expected. Being an Army wife, I find that the circles of people that I'm associating with are typically the wives of H's soldier buddies. They aren't necessarily people that I "click" with as easily or automatically as I would outside of the "forced" friendships that the Army lifestyle sets up, but that doesn't make them bad people or bad friendships. They are the silver the song speaks of, friendships that are good to have even if they aren't the same depth or strength as those gold ones created during high school and college. (Disclaimer: I have made some absolutely "golden" friendships up here, as well, and I don't want any of this post to make those wonderful ladies feel anything less than the gold that they are. They know who they are, especially my #2)
Without these silver friendships, the ones that are important but aren't necessarily the long-lasting ones that will pass the test of time, would I be able to value the gold friendships as much?
The friendships that started when we were just infants, grown through the deep and lasting golden friendships of our parents.
The friendships of those started in middle and high school, who I know care despite the fact that we may only chat once every few months.
The friendships of my sorority sisters, who know me better than most people, and who appreciates a random text message knowing exactly what I need, even if all it says "if you're a bird..."
The friendships made in college thanks to mutual friends, who normally may not have started for one reason or another, but who I cherish more than anything because of how they have grown and deepened thanks to God, shared life experiences, and/or the military lifestyle.
Those are the golden friendships, the ones who have depth and meaning that I can appreciate so much more thanks to the silver friendships. And the silver friendships I can appreciate and cherish because those are the friendships that are current and what I need right now, and have the potential to turn into golden friendships as our lives mature and change.
Is one better than the other? I wouldn't say "better" but from my experiences the golden friendships tend to have more meaning at this stage of my life; however, both the gold and silver, new and old friendships are equally important to me, and each friendship individually has its own meaning and importance in my life.
To my golden friendships, I could never fully put into words what your friendship and impact in my life has been and continues to mean to me. I cherish our friendship, even if it's just a text or chat message once in a while to check in, a "thinking of you" card in the mail, or a coffee date over the phone. You mean the world to me, and I hope that our friendships continue to last a lifetime!
And to my silver friendships, I am so thankful for God bringing you into my life recently. Your friendship means so much to me, even if it's not as old or as time-tested as the golden friendships from earlier in my life, and I love the memories we've made and continue to make together. Even something as simple as coffee on the porch, a day at the beach, or girls night with munchies and movies means so much to me to know that I have you as part of my "Army family" away from home.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Monday, July 7, 2014
Saturday, April 19, 2014
Lent Lessons
I've spent the past 40 days off of Facebook for personal use as my sacrifice for Lent.
Disclaimer: I totally used it for Tastefully Simple stuff and PWOC Bible study stuff. God and I worked it out. No biggie.
The idea was that I was giving up something that I rely on and waste a lot of time on to show God that I don't need it because He is all I need. Because, really, do I need Facebook in my life? Not really. I mean, sure there are times where it's convenient to have, especially now that we've become a society where everything is shared, announced, and updated in milliseconds on the social network. But by giving up Facebook and worshiping God by showing Him that He is more important than Facebook, He showed me a lot of things and opened a lot of new doors.
I spent the beginning of Lent hanging out with my sister and her fiance who came up to visit. Instead of sitting on the couch on my phone/laptop checking Facebook, I actually interacted with Mindy and Clay and enjoyed all of our time together, present in the moment. We cooked dinner together, had sister time, game night, and just truly enjoyed being together for the long weekend. For the first time in a while, I actually felt like I was present in the moment instead of distracted by my phone.
I also got to spend a weekend with my beautiful sisters in Christ in Washington DC at the Global Prayer Gathering for the International Justice Mission. I spent 3 days deep in God' presence as He opened my eyes and my heart to injustice going on all over the world. From forced labor to sex slavery, so many of God's children are stuck in the dark, and it was incredible to be surrounded by 1200 other believers lifting up these mission workers and enslaved people together in His name. God called me to get out of my comfort zone and showed me some areas of my life He's calling to, but that's for another blog post. He also answered a long-standing prayer for more Godly women to build friendships with, which was amazing.
I had the opportunity to reunite with two of my absolute best friends from Ohio during this 40 days, and to just enjoy being together for the first time in almost 2 years! We laughed, we reminisced, we ate junk food, and we enjoyed every minute of our time together. It gave me a chance to show them around Drum and Syracuse, to introduce them to some of my Army family up here, and to finally share this chapter of my life with them. I absolutely loved having them here, and was so sad when they had to leave, but it was such a blessing that God worked out that they could be up here for almost 5 whole days with me!
God also opened a new door in terms of a job for the summer. I've been praying and very worried about what I would do when the school year ended and I couldn't sub anymore. With graduation coming in August and my loans coming out of deferment, I knew I needed something and I just kept praying that God would provide. Boy did He ever! A friend in PWOC introduced me to one of her wonderful neighbors and her 4-year-old son. She was in desperate need of full-time childcare for her son in their house, and after a 2-hour interview we realized that so many of our thoughts on children and development are on the same page. I start at the end of this month spending Monday through Friday with this sweet little boy who just needs some boundaries and love, and God has truly come through more than I could have ever hoped in terms of providing for our finances.
Lent also saw the end of another grad school semester, the completion (and passing) of my Master's thesis paper, and some more weight loss - woo hoo!
But the best part about Lent this year? That I have developed a deeper and strengthened relationship with God. As we're into Easter weekend at this point, the sacrifice and love that Christ showed to all of us has never been more apparent to me, and I'm so thankful for His grace and mercies, which I don't deserve but which are always enough!
So happy Easter to you and your family. May you spend tomorrow surrounded with people you love, celebrating God's love however you see fit. No matter what you do, though, don't forget to take a moment to sit in peace, surrounded by His presence, and thank Him for His undeserved but immeasurable love.
He is risen!
Disclaimer: I totally used it for Tastefully Simple stuff and PWOC Bible study stuff. God and I worked it out. No biggie.
The idea was that I was giving up something that I rely on and waste a lot of time on to show God that I don't need it because He is all I need. Because, really, do I need Facebook in my life? Not really. I mean, sure there are times where it's convenient to have, especially now that we've become a society where everything is shared, announced, and updated in milliseconds on the social network. But by giving up Facebook and worshiping God by showing Him that He is more important than Facebook, He showed me a lot of things and opened a lot of new doors.
I spent the beginning of Lent hanging out with my sister and her fiance who came up to visit. Instead of sitting on the couch on my phone/laptop checking Facebook, I actually interacted with Mindy and Clay and enjoyed all of our time together, present in the moment. We cooked dinner together, had sister time, game night, and just truly enjoyed being together for the long weekend. For the first time in a while, I actually felt like I was present in the moment instead of distracted by my phone.
I also got to spend a weekend with my beautiful sisters in Christ in Washington DC at the Global Prayer Gathering for the International Justice Mission. I spent 3 days deep in God' presence as He opened my eyes and my heart to injustice going on all over the world. From forced labor to sex slavery, so many of God's children are stuck in the dark, and it was incredible to be surrounded by 1200 other believers lifting up these mission workers and enslaved people together in His name. God called me to get out of my comfort zone and showed me some areas of my life He's calling to, but that's for another blog post. He also answered a long-standing prayer for more Godly women to build friendships with, which was amazing.
I had the opportunity to reunite with two of my absolute best friends from Ohio during this 40 days, and to just enjoy being together for the first time in almost 2 years! We laughed, we reminisced, we ate junk food, and we enjoyed every minute of our time together. It gave me a chance to show them around Drum and Syracuse, to introduce them to some of my Army family up here, and to finally share this chapter of my life with them. I absolutely loved having them here, and was so sad when they had to leave, but it was such a blessing that God worked out that they could be up here for almost 5 whole days with me!
God also opened a new door in terms of a job for the summer. I've been praying and very worried about what I would do when the school year ended and I couldn't sub anymore. With graduation coming in August and my loans coming out of deferment, I knew I needed something and I just kept praying that God would provide. Boy did He ever! A friend in PWOC introduced me to one of her wonderful neighbors and her 4-year-old son. She was in desperate need of full-time childcare for her son in their house, and after a 2-hour interview we realized that so many of our thoughts on children and development are on the same page. I start at the end of this month spending Monday through Friday with this sweet little boy who just needs some boundaries and love, and God has truly come through more than I could have ever hoped in terms of providing for our finances.
Lent also saw the end of another grad school semester, the completion (and passing) of my Master's thesis paper, and some more weight loss - woo hoo!
But the best part about Lent this year? That I have developed a deeper and strengthened relationship with God. As we're into Easter weekend at this point, the sacrifice and love that Christ showed to all of us has never been more apparent to me, and I'm so thankful for His grace and mercies, which I don't deserve but which are always enough!
So happy Easter to you and your family. May you spend tomorrow surrounded with people you love, celebrating God's love however you see fit. No matter what you do, though, don't forget to take a moment to sit in peace, surrounded by His presence, and thank Him for His undeserved but immeasurable love.
He is risen!
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Holes in our Heart
A small baby, but a big hole.
So far, that's the most accurate sentiment for what I'm feeling. At only 9 weeks (but measuring 6), our baby was the size of a lentil when we went into the ER for an ultrasound due to cramping and bleeding. That was four days ago. A lentil. And yet the hole it's left in our hearts and our lives is so much bigger.
I don't think anyone goes into a pregnancy expecting a miscarriage. But everyone goes in with the fear of it. Monday night, our biggest fear came true. Too much cramping and bleeding. Four hours, a pelvic exam, an ultrasound, and a lot of tears later, we were sent home with discharge papers and an informational handout on "threatened miscarriage." I wish I could say that things turned around after going home, but God had a different plan.
For the past three days, we have been processing our loss. Last night (Wednesday) was when our fear finally came full circle and I fully miscarried. There's no better way to say it, no way to sugar coat it or make it sound more poetic than it is. I miscarried our first pregnancy. Our first baby. And the biggest thing I have had to overcome through all of this processing is blaming myself. But that's for another post...
There is no right or wrong way to process this, from what we've found. There's no right or wrong way to feel. There's no prescribed length of time it takes to get through this. It's all a guessing game for us. We're learning each moment of each day what's right for us, for our family, and how we process it. I don't know if it will ever truly "go away" or "get better." What I do know is that this has brought H and I closer, and has given us a new appreciation for the child that God will bless us with when the time is right.
We're finding that our love is strong enough to overcome even the greatest loss. And that you can never take your partner's love and strength for granted. I honestly have no idea how I would have gotten through any of this without him by my side through it all.
We're finding that our faith is stronger than we realize. And that God's plan is always greater, even if we can't see it or understand it.
And we're learning that the support of our friends and family is crucial. No one ever really knows what to say when this happens, unless you've actually been through a miscarriage. Thank goodness for the support of a friend who has had her own share of heartache from the loss of a baby. She let me cry, ask questions, grieve, and move forward with an openness that I appreciate more than she can ever know. Nothing was off limits, and that's what I needed to help me process all of this. And the constant support of my mother, my best friend, and my sister is something that I can never truly repay. The patience, the understanding, the reminder that it's not my fault and that God has a bigger plan - I don't think I could have made it through all of this without their constant support and love.
Have we given up hope of being parents? Not by a long shot.
As soon as we're ready, we're getting back on that horse and trusting God's timing.
But I don't think we'll ever forget our first Nugget baby, our first love and loss. God had other plans for that baby, and has other plans for us. If anything, this loss has taught us to lean even more on our faith in God and on each other for strength. It's taught us that everything happens for a reason, even if we don't know what that reason is or if it makes sense to us.
It's taught us that even the smallest baby can leave the biggest hole.
So far, that's the most accurate sentiment for what I'm feeling. At only 9 weeks (but measuring 6), our baby was the size of a lentil when we went into the ER for an ultrasound due to cramping and bleeding. That was four days ago. A lentil. And yet the hole it's left in our hearts and our lives is so much bigger.
I don't think anyone goes into a pregnancy expecting a miscarriage. But everyone goes in with the fear of it. Monday night, our biggest fear came true. Too much cramping and bleeding. Four hours, a pelvic exam, an ultrasound, and a lot of tears later, we were sent home with discharge papers and an informational handout on "threatened miscarriage." I wish I could say that things turned around after going home, but God had a different plan.
For the past three days, we have been processing our loss. Last night (Wednesday) was when our fear finally came full circle and I fully miscarried. There's no better way to say it, no way to sugar coat it or make it sound more poetic than it is. I miscarried our first pregnancy. Our first baby. And the biggest thing I have had to overcome through all of this processing is blaming myself. But that's for another post...
There is no right or wrong way to process this, from what we've found. There's no right or wrong way to feel. There's no prescribed length of time it takes to get through this. It's all a guessing game for us. We're learning each moment of each day what's right for us, for our family, and how we process it. I don't know if it will ever truly "go away" or "get better." What I do know is that this has brought H and I closer, and has given us a new appreciation for the child that God will bless us with when the time is right.
We're finding that our love is strong enough to overcome even the greatest loss. And that you can never take your partner's love and strength for granted. I honestly have no idea how I would have gotten through any of this without him by my side through it all.
We're finding that our faith is stronger than we realize. And that God's plan is always greater, even if we can't see it or understand it.
And we're learning that the support of our friends and family is crucial. No one ever really knows what to say when this happens, unless you've actually been through a miscarriage. Thank goodness for the support of a friend who has had her own share of heartache from the loss of a baby. She let me cry, ask questions, grieve, and move forward with an openness that I appreciate more than she can ever know. Nothing was off limits, and that's what I needed to help me process all of this. And the constant support of my mother, my best friend, and my sister is something that I can never truly repay. The patience, the understanding, the reminder that it's not my fault and that God has a bigger plan - I don't think I could have made it through all of this without their constant support and love.
Have we given up hope of being parents? Not by a long shot.
As soon as we're ready, we're getting back on that horse and trusting God's timing.
But I don't think we'll ever forget our first Nugget baby, our first love and loss. God had other plans for that baby, and has other plans for us. If anything, this loss has taught us to lean even more on our faith in God and on each other for strength. It's taught us that everything happens for a reason, even if we don't know what that reason is or if it makes sense to us.
It's taught us that even the smallest baby can leave the biggest hole.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Momma's Day :)
It's that special Sunday where everyone remembers why they love the one woman who as loved them from the start - their mom. I'm blessed to have a lot of really strong women in my life who have helped raise and influence me, so today I'll be taking time to talk about each one of them.
Being that it's Mother's Day, I'll start with my mom (of course!) and all the amazingness that she is. The amount of patience this woman has is unfathomable considering all she's put up with between me and my sister over the years. She's been the foundation that I've built my life upon and when I look at where I am in life, I know I wouldn't be where I am or who I am without her. She taught me so much over the years: the importance of God in my life and always coming back to Him; how to properly plant a garden that actually looks good and lasts the summer; that sometimes you shouldn't try to dig up big bushes in the backyard if there's a chance a stick might stab you in the eye; how to cook a delicious meal using family recipes passed down through generations; that overdrawing your bank account not only causes financial problems but that it makes your mom REALLY mad; that even though she's REALLY mad forgiveness is still a part of loving someone; and that being a genuine, loving, compassionate person is more important that having every material item in the world. She's my best friend who has been there for me when I've been overcome by sadness or needed to share something exciting in my life, she's been a role model for holding a marriage together, grounding yourself in God's love and truths, and having a heart for service to others. I attribute my character, sense of humor, frizzy hair, and love of academics all to her, and I am so thankful to have her as my Momma.
Who taught my mom all this amazingness that she could pass on to me and my sister? Why, her mother, of course. My Grammy was an amazing woman, a true saint in her own right. To this day, she is one of the strongest Christian women I have ever known, and was the true matriarch of our family. She made birthday cakes for Jesus every Christmas, and kept oatmeal cookies on the kitchen counter at all times. She could make you feel like the most important person in the world with her love and kind words, but wasn't afraid to put you in your place if you got out of line (and trust me, that wasn't something you wanted to hear from her!). She spent her Sunday's watching NASCAR and TBN church services with her shotgun by her side, ready to take out any groundhog trying to dig holes in her yard. She was the woman I called when I was home sick from school just to hear her tell me to drink water and eat crackers in my jammies till I felt better, the woman I ate pie and drank coffee with on Saturday afternoons when I had breaks and was home from college. She yelled at me for getting a tattoo, then told me how cute the black ink butterfly on my shoulder actually was. There isn't a day that goes by, even seven years later, that I don't think about her or see her influence somewhere in my life. I know she's up in Heaven fussing over whether or not the angels have planted the spring flowers in the right spots of God's garden :)
I've been fortunate enough to have a few "adopted moms" growing up, too. Joni and Kim, mothers to my best friends since we were just babies, have been there for me for the past 27 years. From help planning secret parties for my parents, advice on everything from school to boys, even just keeping me in line when my own mom wasn't there and I felt like I could probably get away with something (so optimistic on my part, and yet so wrong haha!). They both saw me as their own child, and made sure that if I needed something they would try their best to take care of me. I'm beyond thankful for their influence, love, and guidance growing up and for seeing me as their own daughter.
I can't help but look at today with some optimism and butterflies in my tummy that maybe just maybe this will be my last mother's day without being a mommy. One thing I know for sure is that I have had a lot of "lessons" over the years of what a good mother/mother figure should be thanks to my incredible mom and all the other amazing mother figures in my life. If I can be even half the mother that these woman have added up to be, I know my child will be blessed beyond belief and will (hopefully) grow up with good character, strong faith, and a compassion for helping others.
Happy Mother's Day to all my friends who are mommies, mommies-to-be, have been an "adopted" mommy to another child, a role model, a teacher, or who have had any kind of positive influence on a child around them. You have no idea how loved you truly are!
-M
Being that it's Mother's Day, I'll start with my mom (of course!) and all the amazingness that she is. The amount of patience this woman has is unfathomable considering all she's put up with between me and my sister over the years. She's been the foundation that I've built my life upon and when I look at where I am in life, I know I wouldn't be where I am or who I am without her. She taught me so much over the years: the importance of God in my life and always coming back to Him; how to properly plant a garden that actually looks good and lasts the summer; that sometimes you shouldn't try to dig up big bushes in the backyard if there's a chance a stick might stab you in the eye; how to cook a delicious meal using family recipes passed down through generations; that overdrawing your bank account not only causes financial problems but that it makes your mom REALLY mad; that even though she's REALLY mad forgiveness is still a part of loving someone; and that being a genuine, loving, compassionate person is more important that having every material item in the world. She's my best friend who has been there for me when I've been overcome by sadness or needed to share something exciting in my life, she's been a role model for holding a marriage together, grounding yourself in God's love and truths, and having a heart for service to others. I attribute my character, sense of humor, frizzy hair, and love of academics all to her, and I am so thankful to have her as my Momma.
Who taught my mom all this amazingness that she could pass on to me and my sister? Why, her mother, of course. My Grammy was an amazing woman, a true saint in her own right. To this day, she is one of the strongest Christian women I have ever known, and was the true matriarch of our family. She made birthday cakes for Jesus every Christmas, and kept oatmeal cookies on the kitchen counter at all times. She could make you feel like the most important person in the world with her love and kind words, but wasn't afraid to put you in your place if you got out of line (and trust me, that wasn't something you wanted to hear from her!). She spent her Sunday's watching NASCAR and TBN church services with her shotgun by her side, ready to take out any groundhog trying to dig holes in her yard. She was the woman I called when I was home sick from school just to hear her tell me to drink water and eat crackers in my jammies till I felt better, the woman I ate pie and drank coffee with on Saturday afternoons when I had breaks and was home from college. She yelled at me for getting a tattoo, then told me how cute the black ink butterfly on my shoulder actually was. There isn't a day that goes by, even seven years later, that I don't think about her or see her influence somewhere in my life. I know she's up in Heaven fussing over whether or not the angels have planted the spring flowers in the right spots of God's garden :)
I've been fortunate enough to have a few "adopted moms" growing up, too. Joni and Kim, mothers to my best friends since we were just babies, have been there for me for the past 27 years. From help planning secret parties for my parents, advice on everything from school to boys, even just keeping me in line when my own mom wasn't there and I felt like I could probably get away with something (so optimistic on my part, and yet so wrong haha!). They both saw me as their own child, and made sure that if I needed something they would try their best to take care of me. I'm beyond thankful for their influence, love, and guidance growing up and for seeing me as their own daughter.
I can't help but look at today with some optimism and butterflies in my tummy that maybe just maybe this will be my last mother's day without being a mommy. One thing I know for sure is that I have had a lot of "lessons" over the years of what a good mother/mother figure should be thanks to my incredible mom and all the other amazing mother figures in my life. If I can be even half the mother that these woman have added up to be, I know my child will be blessed beyond belief and will (hopefully) grow up with good character, strong faith, and a compassion for helping others.
 |
| My momma and me through the years! |
Happy Mother's Day to all my friends who are mommies, mommies-to-be, have been an "adopted" mommy to another child, a role model, a teacher, or who have had any kind of positive influence on a child around them. You have no idea how loved you truly are!
-M
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Updates and Eye Twitches
Wow. It's been over a month since I've blogged. I feel almost as bad as I do when I go too long without going to the gym! Funny how something silly and little like blogging, that's only meant to be cathartic, can become such a powerful force in your life.
I'll be honest and admit why I haven't blogged recently. It's because I've been avoiding my feelings. I've always been a journaler. Yes, I made that word up. But it's true; infact, I still have the journal that I kept when I was in 5th grade. I love to write and to get my feelings down on paper (or in this case, on a screen), because it helps me work through my thoughts. Lately, though, all of my thoughts and feelings are surrounding the fact that H leaves for Basic Training in one month.
I don't want to think about it. I don't want to deal with the fact that in one month I have to kiss my husband goodbye, hug him for the last time until July. I don't want to accept that I won't be able to talk to him every day, to cuddle up with him when it's been a rough one. I want to pretend that he'll still be here. So rather than think/talk/write about it, I push it to the back of my mind. Doing this has caused a semi-permanent eye twitch, but I'd much rather deal with that than the reality of my husband leaving right now. So instead of blogging, I pretend it's not happening, which means right now I have very little to blog about.
Life in general is good. God has blessed us with a lot so far this year, including a full-time job for me at the Montessori School, H hitting his goal weight for his contract, and getting to spend a lot of quality time with our friends and family before he leaves. Financially, it's been a good year so far, too, with our big tax refund blessing on its way. Our families are doing well, our friends are doing well, and we are doing well, so the only feelings that I've had to work through are the ones that I'm pretending aren't there. I know it's coming to a breaking point with those, however, and I'm waiting for that moment when I can't hold it back any longer and everything comes out (like emotional vomit) onto this blog. Although maybe that's a post I'll write in my paper journal (yes, I do still keep one of those, as well!) because I have a feeling it will be more personal than I choose to share here. Of course, there will still be a blog update, just maybe not as graphic as the one in my paper journal.
I know that as things get closer to his leaving, and as things get busier around here with the end of the school year (gosh, it seems so early to think about that already!) and with getting ready to move back to my parents' house, the postings here will become more frequent. Also, I'll be bringing back my crafting, too! Right now, with working about 45 hours per week, it can sometimes be tough to fit in a really good project. But once H leaves and I need things to occupy my time/mind, the projects will be making a spectacular comeback! :)
Bear with me.
It's about to get emotional around here...
xoxo, M
I'll be honest and admit why I haven't blogged recently. It's because I've been avoiding my feelings. I've always been a journaler. Yes, I made that word up. But it's true; infact, I still have the journal that I kept when I was in 5th grade. I love to write and to get my feelings down on paper (or in this case, on a screen), because it helps me work through my thoughts. Lately, though, all of my thoughts and feelings are surrounding the fact that H leaves for Basic Training in one month.
I don't want to think about it. I don't want to deal with the fact that in one month I have to kiss my husband goodbye, hug him for the last time until July. I don't want to accept that I won't be able to talk to him every day, to cuddle up with him when it's been a rough one. I want to pretend that he'll still be here. So rather than think/talk/write about it, I push it to the back of my mind. Doing this has caused a semi-permanent eye twitch, but I'd much rather deal with that than the reality of my husband leaving right now. So instead of blogging, I pretend it's not happening, which means right now I have very little to blog about.
Life in general is good. God has blessed us with a lot so far this year, including a full-time job for me at the Montessori School, H hitting his goal weight for his contract, and getting to spend a lot of quality time with our friends and family before he leaves. Financially, it's been a good year so far, too, with our big tax refund blessing on its way. Our families are doing well, our friends are doing well, and we are doing well, so the only feelings that I've had to work through are the ones that I'm pretending aren't there. I know it's coming to a breaking point with those, however, and I'm waiting for that moment when I can't hold it back any longer and everything comes out (like emotional vomit) onto this blog. Although maybe that's a post I'll write in my paper journal (yes, I do still keep one of those, as well!) because I have a feeling it will be more personal than I choose to share here. Of course, there will still be a blog update, just maybe not as graphic as the one in my paper journal.
I know that as things get closer to his leaving, and as things get busier around here with the end of the school year (gosh, it seems so early to think about that already!) and with getting ready to move back to my parents' house, the postings here will become more frequent. Also, I'll be bringing back my crafting, too! Right now, with working about 45 hours per week, it can sometimes be tough to fit in a really good project. But once H leaves and I need things to occupy my time/mind, the projects will be making a spectacular comeback! :)
Bear with me.
It's about to get emotional around here...
xoxo, M
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Numbers Game
Feeling slightly discouraged tonight. I don't know if it's the January blues, or that I've had some startling numbers thrown my way lately, but it's not a very fun feeling. I know I'll get through it because I have an amazing support system of my husband, my friends, my family, and God, but the more I think about these numbers, the more discouraged I get.
36.5 = my body fat percentage (gross.)
29 = my body mass index (one step short of obese, although if you've seen me you wouldn't EVER think that!)
75 = number of days until H leaves for the Army
5 = the average number of hours I sleep every night because I can't seem to stay asleep
16 = the number of consecutive days I've had an eye twitch brought on my stress
Okay.
So these numbers aren't great.
I know that the first 2 and the last 2 can improve. But that third number really gets me. After having my husband by my side for the past 4 years (minus a few bumps in the road) while we were dating, and after having lived with him in our tiny apartment for the past year and a half, it's going to be hard to be here alone, knowing that he's not coming home anytime soon and not knowing when the next time I'll hear from him will be.
Times when 75 seems like a big number:
-When you need to lose 75 pounds (thankfully I only need to lose 50!)
-When it's the number of envelopes you need to lick, address, and stamp before the mail comes in the afternoon
-When it's the number of minutes you have to sit with your crazy Aunt Ida who can't seem to stop asking about when you're going to find a man/get married/have a baby/have a steady job/move out on your own.
Times when 75 seems like a small number:
-When it's your paycheck after 2 weeks of work
-When it's the number of people who RSVP'd to your wedding (you'd invited 200...)
-When it's the number of days until you live alone and don't speak to your husband on a daily/hourly basis and you miss him in amounts larger than you ever thought possible.
Repeat after me...
I can do this.
I can do this.
Thank goodness for my momma, God, and moosetracks ice cream to get me through this... oops. That last thing is probably why I have the first 2 numbers on my list...
xoxo, Melissa
36.5 = my body fat percentage (gross.)
29 = my body mass index (one step short of obese, although if you've seen me you wouldn't EVER think that!)
75 = number of days until H leaves for the Army
5 = the average number of hours I sleep every night because I can't seem to stay asleep
16 = the number of consecutive days I've had an eye twitch brought on my stress
Okay.
So these numbers aren't great.
I know that the first 2 and the last 2 can improve. But that third number really gets me. After having my husband by my side for the past 4 years (minus a few bumps in the road) while we were dating, and after having lived with him in our tiny apartment for the past year and a half, it's going to be hard to be here alone, knowing that he's not coming home anytime soon and not knowing when the next time I'll hear from him will be.
Times when 75 seems like a big number:
-When you need to lose 75 pounds (thankfully I only need to lose 50!)
-When it's the number of envelopes you need to lick, address, and stamp before the mail comes in the afternoon
-When it's the number of minutes you have to sit with your crazy Aunt Ida who can't seem to stop asking about when you're going to find a man/get married/have a baby/have a steady job/move out on your own.
Times when 75 seems like a small number:
-When it's your paycheck after 2 weeks of work
-When it's the number of people who RSVP'd to your wedding (you'd invited 200...)
-When it's the number of days until you live alone and don't speak to your husband on a daily/hourly basis and you miss him in amounts larger than you ever thought possible.
Repeat after me...
I can do this.
I can do this.
Thank goodness for my momma, God, and moosetracks ice cream to get me through this... oops. That last thing is probably why I have the first 2 numbers on my list...
xoxo, Melissa
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Soon Enough
I'm on a list-making/calendar-filling kick right now.
Let me explain. I'm overly organized by most people's standards. I have small notebooks for different things (Army info, wedding stuff, bills and budget, etc.). We have a dry erase monthly calendar hanging on the front door with weekly/month to-do lists. We have a dry erase board on the fridge for miscellaneous information that we need to share/remember. I have a food planner/weekly calendar for meals on the fridge. I have a planner that is color-coordinated that I swear if ever got lost would cause me coronary arrest. And I can't live without post-it notes and lists.
Obsessive about staying organized? Probably.
But I'll tell you this---it's been extremely useful in making sure things don't fall apart around here.
It's the beginning of a new year, so it only makes sense for me to start some lists and open my new 2012 planner. I didn't go overboard with them, don't worry. But there are a lot of things that need to get done and a lot of events that are coming up that I need to stay organized for. Don't judge me---list-making and calendar-filling make me feel better. Seriously, stop judging...okaythanks. :)
It's come to my attention that H leaves in just under 3 months. Wow...that's really stinkin' close. So today I started my "Pre-Ship Honey-Do List" and began thinking of all the things I need him to do, to show me, and to prepare before he leaves. This, of course, led me to a small crying meltdown. No big deal, but I get the feeling this are going to be happening more often as March 26 gets closer. That led me to realize that I have less than 3 months to drop 30 pounds. I want to be as close to my goal weight as possible before he leaves (because who wants to remember a fatty wife all through basic?! haha just kidding...no but seriously...) and I can lose 30 healthily, even though I'll still be about 20 pounds from my actual goal weight. Yes, that means I have 50 pounds to lose.
This led me to list number 2: my "no holds barred, must lose weight" list. This list is a little simpler, and includes the following: the only foods that are Paleo-friendly that we're allowing in this house and the CrossFit exercise plan I will be following. Surprisingly, this list I'm really excited about. We got 2 really amazing Paleo cookbooks for Christmas (Paleo Comfort Foods and The Primal Blueprint Cookbook) and with my great new weekly food planning/grocery list calendar, we're able to plan out some tasty new Paleo meals. Today, I made Paleo biscuits and gravy, and it was probably as close to Bob Evans as I can possibly get. Delicious! :)
List number 2 makes me happy: Thursday can't come soon enough so I can get back into the gym and do some CrossFit again. My body has never been happier than when I was CrossFitting/lifting on a regular basis and when I was eating Paleo 90% of the time.
List number 1 makes me sad: March 26 is going to be here too soon, and then I will have to say goodbye to my best friend for about 8 months---7 of which will be during our first year of marriage (no bueno). I'm beyond happy to see him finally start his career and for this chapter of our life to begin, but I'm not happy to see him leave. That's a whole different post, though...
xoxo, Melissa
Let me explain. I'm overly organized by most people's standards. I have small notebooks for different things (Army info, wedding stuff, bills and budget, etc.). We have a dry erase monthly calendar hanging on the front door with weekly/month to-do lists. We have a dry erase board on the fridge for miscellaneous information that we need to share/remember. I have a food planner/weekly calendar for meals on the fridge. I have a planner that is color-coordinated that I swear if ever got lost would cause me coronary arrest. And I can't live without post-it notes and lists.
Obsessive about staying organized? Probably.
But I'll tell you this---it's been extremely useful in making sure things don't fall apart around here.
It's the beginning of a new year, so it only makes sense for me to start some lists and open my new 2012 planner. I didn't go overboard with them, don't worry. But there are a lot of things that need to get done and a lot of events that are coming up that I need to stay organized for. Don't judge me---list-making and calendar-filling make me feel better. Seriously, stop judging...okaythanks. :)
It's come to my attention that H leaves in just under 3 months. Wow...that's really stinkin' close. So today I started my "Pre-Ship Honey-Do List" and began thinking of all the things I need him to do, to show me, and to prepare before he leaves. This, of course, led me to a small crying meltdown. No big deal, but I get the feeling this are going to be happening more often as March 26 gets closer. That led me to realize that I have less than 3 months to drop 30 pounds. I want to be as close to my goal weight as possible before he leaves (because who wants to remember a fatty wife all through basic?! haha just kidding...no but seriously...) and I can lose 30 healthily, even though I'll still be about 20 pounds from my actual goal weight. Yes, that means I have 50 pounds to lose.
This led me to list number 2: my "no holds barred, must lose weight" list. This list is a little simpler, and includes the following: the only foods that are Paleo-friendly that we're allowing in this house and the CrossFit exercise plan I will be following. Surprisingly, this list I'm really excited about. We got 2 really amazing Paleo cookbooks for Christmas (Paleo Comfort Foods and The Primal Blueprint Cookbook) and with my great new weekly food planning/grocery list calendar, we're able to plan out some tasty new Paleo meals. Today, I made Paleo biscuits and gravy, and it was probably as close to Bob Evans as I can possibly get. Delicious! :)
List number 2 makes me happy: Thursday can't come soon enough so I can get back into the gym and do some CrossFit again. My body has never been happier than when I was CrossFitting/lifting on a regular basis and when I was eating Paleo 90% of the time.
List number 1 makes me sad: March 26 is going to be here too soon, and then I will have to say goodbye to my best friend for about 8 months---7 of which will be during our first year of marriage (no bueno). I'm beyond happy to see him finally start his career and for this chapter of our life to begin, but I'm not happy to see him leave. That's a whole different post, though...
xoxo, Melissa
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
12 Projects of Christmas: Guinness Cupcakes
This was definitely not a project I was planning to make, but it falls under the gift category so I decided to post it. Plus, it had rave reviews from JP, so I thought it would be great to share!
My "brother" JP is proudly Irish, and LOVES anything to do with his heritage, especially the beers. His favorite beer? Guinness. Now personally, I think Guinness is awful---it's thick and dry and the flavor is terrible. But JP loves it so much, so as soon as I saw this recipe I knew I had to make these for him. I tweaked the recipe a little to make it work for his taste, and I have to say these did turn out really good! Even for not liking Guinness, the flavor that it adds to the chocolate cupcake is wonderful!
So here we go:
Grab your ingredients!
1 cup unsalted butter
1 cup Guinness stout
2/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 cup light brown sugar
1 teaspoon table salt
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup sugar
1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
2 eggs
1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 cup unsalted butter
4 cups powdered sugar
1 pinch table salt
3 tablespoons Bailey's (we used the coffee flavor)
1 tablespoon milk
In a saucepan over medium heat, warm the butter, Guinness, cocoa powder, and brown sugar until the butter has melted and it's all smooth. Make sure to whisk often because you don't want it to boil or burn. The bubbles you see in the picture is actually the foam from the beer--the foam will cook down, don't worry. Once it's all smooth, let it cool until it's room temp or a little warmer.
Now, in a bowl, sift the flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt together.
Add the Guinness mix to the bowl and mix until well combined. Add the eggs and sour cream, and mix again.
Pour into your cupcake pan (make sure to use liners or grease the tin very well!) Bake at 325 degrees for 24 minutes, then let cool completely before frosting!
Here's the frosting recipe (ingredients are listed above)
Make sure you start with butter that's softened to room temp or else this will be very hard! Cream the butter with a hand/stand mixer, then add the powdered sugar about 1/4 cup at a time (maybe even a little less than that--you be the judge) until you've added 2 cups total. Add the milk and Bailey's, mix, and then continue to add the powdered sugar until the frosting is the consistency you want. If you add too much powdered sugar, go ahead and add a little more milk. Be careful adding too much Bailey's, because the frosting is very sweet so too much Bailey's can make it a little overpowering.
So I gotta say, even though I don't like Guinness, these cupcakes are addictive and delicious! I sprinkled with a little sanding sugar for decoration (not that JP actually cares about how they look, just how they taste! lol)
These would make a great gift for a guy in the family, or as a fun twist on Holiday treats at the family gathering ;)
Pin It
xoxo, Melissa
My "brother" JP is proudly Irish, and LOVES anything to do with his heritage, especially the beers. His favorite beer? Guinness. Now personally, I think Guinness is awful---it's thick and dry and the flavor is terrible. But JP loves it so much, so as soon as I saw this recipe I knew I had to make these for him. I tweaked the recipe a little to make it work for his taste, and I have to say these did turn out really good! Even for not liking Guinness, the flavor that it adds to the chocolate cupcake is wonderful!
So here we go:
Grab your ingredients!
1 cup unsalted butter
1 cup Guinness stout
2/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 cup light brown sugar
1 teaspoon table salt
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup sugar
1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
2 eggs
1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 cup unsalted butter
4 cups powdered sugar
1 pinch table salt
3 tablespoons Bailey's (we used the coffee flavor)
1 tablespoon milk
In a saucepan over medium heat, warm the butter, Guinness, cocoa powder, and brown sugar until the butter has melted and it's all smooth. Make sure to whisk often because you don't want it to boil or burn. The bubbles you see in the picture is actually the foam from the beer--the foam will cook down, don't worry. Once it's all smooth, let it cool until it's room temp or a little warmer.
Now, in a bowl, sift the flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt together.
Add the Guinness mix to the bowl and mix until well combined. Add the eggs and sour cream, and mix again.
Pour into your cupcake pan (make sure to use liners or grease the tin very well!) Bake at 325 degrees for 24 minutes, then let cool completely before frosting!
Here's the frosting recipe (ingredients are listed above)
Make sure you start with butter that's softened to room temp or else this will be very hard! Cream the butter with a hand/stand mixer, then add the powdered sugar about 1/4 cup at a time (maybe even a little less than that--you be the judge) until you've added 2 cups total. Add the milk and Bailey's, mix, and then continue to add the powdered sugar until the frosting is the consistency you want. If you add too much powdered sugar, go ahead and add a little more milk. Be careful adding too much Bailey's, because the frosting is very sweet so too much Bailey's can make it a little overpowering.
So I gotta say, even though I don't like Guinness, these cupcakes are addictive and delicious! I sprinkled with a little sanding sugar for decoration (not that JP actually cares about how they look, just how they taste! lol)
These would make a great gift for a guy in the family, or as a fun twist on Holiday treats at the family gathering ;)
Pin It
xoxo, Melissa
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Happy Thanksgiving
I have so much to be thankful for this year, and while I know I should sit and look at all of wonderful things God has blessed me with every day, I admit that I pay more attention to it as Thanksgiving approaches.
Here's my 2011 list of what I'm thankful for:
-Of course, having a brand new husband and being able to spend the rest of my life with my best friend by my side
-A nephew who may not have been expected, but who is probably one of the most wonderful blessings for our family this year
-My family, who has been supremely supportive in during my not-so-amazing job at the beginning of this year, not to mention everything else they have done for/with me including giving us an amazing wedding and honeymoon
-A wonderful new family of in-laws who are so loving and who considered me part of the family a long time ago
-A job that gives me some semblance of hope in the educational system, in our future children, and in getting support from the parents of my students
-The new financial opportunities that have come my way through being an Avon representative
-Reconnecting with old friends and staying in touch no matter the distance between us
-My husband finally being able to sign his contract with the Army and having some idea of where our future in the Army is starting out
I think I'm going to make it a goal for 2012 to keep track of my daily blessings in my paper journal (Yes, I still have a paper journal on top of my blog! In fact, I've kept a paper journal since roughly the 5th grade. I'm a nerd.) God has blessed me with so much, and I don't want to only remember those blessings one month/day a year. Goal for next year (but really, starting tomorrow): be more grateful every day for what I've got.
I hope everyone has safe travels for Thanksgiving, and that you have a chance to remember what blessings have come your way this year. Happy Thanksgiving!
And just for giggles, here's my Google hand turkey from the logo this week:
Here's my 2011 list of what I'm thankful for:
-Of course, having a brand new husband and being able to spend the rest of my life with my best friend by my side
-A nephew who may not have been expected, but who is probably one of the most wonderful blessings for our family this year
-My family, who has been supremely supportive in during my not-so-amazing job at the beginning of this year, not to mention everything else they have done for/with me including giving us an amazing wedding and honeymoon
-A wonderful new family of in-laws who are so loving and who considered me part of the family a long time ago
-A job that gives me some semblance of hope in the educational system, in our future children, and in getting support from the parents of my students
-The new financial opportunities that have come my way through being an Avon representative
-Reconnecting with old friends and staying in touch no matter the distance between us
-My husband finally being able to sign his contract with the Army and having some idea of where our future in the Army is starting out
I think I'm going to make it a goal for 2012 to keep track of my daily blessings in my paper journal (Yes, I still have a paper journal on top of my blog! In fact, I've kept a paper journal since roughly the 5th grade. I'm a nerd.) God has blessed me with so much, and I don't want to only remember those blessings one month/day a year. Goal for next year (but really, starting tomorrow): be more grateful every day for what I've got.
I hope everyone has safe travels for Thanksgiving, and that you have a chance to remember what blessings have come your way this year. Happy Thanksgiving!
And just for giggles, here's my Google hand turkey from the logo this week:
Have a happy and blessed Thanksgiving!
Monday, November 21, 2011
Wedding and Honeymoon Goodies!
Okay, so I've been promising this post for about a week now, and I feel like I finally have time to sit down and write. Just a warning: with all the details, this is kind of a long post. Feel free to jump to the pictures if the details don't interest you. Don't worry, my feelings won't be hurt, I promise! :)
It's official--I'm a Mrs. And I'm pretty much loving it! Although, I don't think the whole "we're actually married" thing has really sunk in. Last week, I was talking to the mother of one of my students and I said "yeah and my husband--" and I totally had to stop and think for a minute! "Husband" came out naturally, but it caught me off-guard at how naturally it came out. It was one of those "who just said that? Wait, that was me?!" moments haha! But being married has been wonderful. I know we're in the "honeymoon" phase, but the love that we feel for each other is immeasurable, and it's been so much fun being the new, silly married couple.
So here's how the day went:
My sister and all her wonderful cosmetologistness (yes, I just made that word up) helped me get ready by doing my hair and helping with my makeup, and she could not have done a more incredible job. I looked and felt like an absolute princess! We'd tested out my hair a few weeks before, just to see if the style I wanted would work with my blusher/birdcage veil, and it looked fabulous during the practice run, but it was seriously amazing for the wedding. Surprisingly, I wasn't feeling very nervous most of the morning. I helped my mom do the finishing touches on the great room where we would be having the ceremony, took some "artsy" photos of the rings, flowers, etc., and even did some laundry! Who does that on their wedding day?! This girl right here...
In case you forgot, we had the wedding in my parents beautiful 2-story livingroom (the great room), and while I'd never pictured getting married at my parents' house, it could not have been more perfect!
So about an hour before the wedding was supposed to start, I was still running around the house prepping things while my mother chased me around yelling "go to your room, people will be here soon!!" Then she banished me to the bedroom to watch TV until she and my sister came to help me get dressed. So what did I do? Um...watched My Fair Wedding and ate cheese crackers. Yup. I didn't actually start feeling nervous until I was in my dress, wearing my veil, holding my bouquet, and waiting for my daddy to come get me. Cue the instant "ohmygoshi'mgonnavomit" feeling!
The ceremony was perfect. A long-time friend's father who is a pastor married us, surrounded by our parents, grandparents, best man, and maid of honor. It was intimate, and that made it so much more special. But the best part of the whole thing? The look in my soon to be husband's eyes when we finally got to look at each other. Just thinking about it still makes me melt. If there was ever a time I questioned his love for me, in that exact instant I knew I would NEVER question it again. I cried a little during the vows, but surprisingly I held it together really well! And to top it off, it snowed on our wedding day! Not a big, wet, gross Ohio snow, but the light and fluffy kind that just made it magical.
After the ceremony and lots of pictures, we went outside where my parents surprised us with a stretch limo to take to the restaurant we went to! The restaurant was delicious, too, and they were so amazing with the service there. First of all, the restaurant was gorgeous and the food was incredible! If you ever get a chance to check out Bravo! Cucina Italiana, I totally recommend it. They were even kind enough to take our cake that we brought with us, plate it and prepare it for cake-cutting, and boxed it back up for us after. While we were there, a random couple came up to us to congratulate us and gave us $100!! Just totally out of the blue, they said they were local pastors that loved to see new married couples and that they felt called to bless us. It was crazy!
After dinner, we got changed and headed off to Cleveland for the weekend for our honeymoon. My parents got us 2 nights at one of the classy hotels in downtown, and our plan was to stay until Sunday afternoon since we both had to work Monday afternoon/evening. We had plans to grab a late dinner/wine tasting Friday night, but by the time we got there we were already exhausted so we checked in, unpacked, and passed out. Saturday was spent at the Great Lakes Science Center (so much fun!) and then we had dinner at Brasa downtown, which is probably the single most incredible restaurant we've ever been to. It deserves its own blog post--it was seriously that good. After dinner, we called the hotel to have the shuttle come pick us up...45 minutes later, they still weren't there. At this point, we were a little bitter about the fact that they forgot to pick us up, but when the driver finally got there, he felt so bad that he comped us an extra night at the hotel! We got an extra night of our honeymoon for free! It was wonderful, and it gave us a chance to try out one more restaurant, do some walking around town, and have dinner with our best man Tony and his new wife Jen.
Overall, it was the single most perfect weekend we could have possibly dreamed of. We are so thankful to my parents for all the work they put into it, and to our friends and family for being there to celebrate one of the most important days with us!
Okay, okay, enough with the details. On to the pics!!
It's official--I'm a Mrs. And I'm pretty much loving it! Although, I don't think the whole "we're actually married" thing has really sunk in. Last week, I was talking to the mother of one of my students and I said "yeah and my husband--" and I totally had to stop and think for a minute! "Husband" came out naturally, but it caught me off-guard at how naturally it came out. It was one of those "who just said that? Wait, that was me?!" moments haha! But being married has been wonderful. I know we're in the "honeymoon" phase, but the love that we feel for each other is immeasurable, and it's been so much fun being the new, silly married couple.
So here's how the day went:
My sister and all her wonderful cosmetologistness (yes, I just made that word up) helped me get ready by doing my hair and helping with my makeup, and she could not have done a more incredible job. I looked and felt like an absolute princess! We'd tested out my hair a few weeks before, just to see if the style I wanted would work with my blusher/birdcage veil, and it looked fabulous during the practice run, but it was seriously amazing for the wedding. Surprisingly, I wasn't feeling very nervous most of the morning. I helped my mom do the finishing touches on the great room where we would be having the ceremony, took some "artsy" photos of the rings, flowers, etc., and even did some laundry! Who does that on their wedding day?! This girl right here...
In case you forgot, we had the wedding in my parents beautiful 2-story livingroom (the great room), and while I'd never pictured getting married at my parents' house, it could not have been more perfect!
So about an hour before the wedding was supposed to start, I was still running around the house prepping things while my mother chased me around yelling "go to your room, people will be here soon!!" Then she banished me to the bedroom to watch TV until she and my sister came to help me get dressed. So what did I do? Um...watched My Fair Wedding and ate cheese crackers. Yup. I didn't actually start feeling nervous until I was in my dress, wearing my veil, holding my bouquet, and waiting for my daddy to come get me. Cue the instant "ohmygoshi'mgonnavomit" feeling!
The ceremony was perfect. A long-time friend's father who is a pastor married us, surrounded by our parents, grandparents, best man, and maid of honor. It was intimate, and that made it so much more special. But the best part of the whole thing? The look in my soon to be husband's eyes when we finally got to look at each other. Just thinking about it still makes me melt. If there was ever a time I questioned his love for me, in that exact instant I knew I would NEVER question it again. I cried a little during the vows, but surprisingly I held it together really well! And to top it off, it snowed on our wedding day! Not a big, wet, gross Ohio snow, but the light and fluffy kind that just made it magical.
After the ceremony and lots of pictures, we went outside where my parents surprised us with a stretch limo to take to the restaurant we went to! The restaurant was delicious, too, and they were so amazing with the service there. First of all, the restaurant was gorgeous and the food was incredible! If you ever get a chance to check out Bravo! Cucina Italiana, I totally recommend it. They were even kind enough to take our cake that we brought with us, plate it and prepare it for cake-cutting, and boxed it back up for us after. While we were there, a random couple came up to us to congratulate us and gave us $100!! Just totally out of the blue, they said they were local pastors that loved to see new married couples and that they felt called to bless us. It was crazy!
After dinner, we got changed and headed off to Cleveland for the weekend for our honeymoon. My parents got us 2 nights at one of the classy hotels in downtown, and our plan was to stay until Sunday afternoon since we both had to work Monday afternoon/evening. We had plans to grab a late dinner/wine tasting Friday night, but by the time we got there we were already exhausted so we checked in, unpacked, and passed out. Saturday was spent at the Great Lakes Science Center (so much fun!) and then we had dinner at Brasa downtown, which is probably the single most incredible restaurant we've ever been to. It deserves its own blog post--it was seriously that good. After dinner, we called the hotel to have the shuttle come pick us up...45 minutes later, they still weren't there. At this point, we were a little bitter about the fact that they forgot to pick us up, but when the driver finally got there, he felt so bad that he comped us an extra night at the hotel! We got an extra night of our honeymoon for free! It was wonderful, and it gave us a chance to try out one more restaurant, do some walking around town, and have dinner with our best man Tony and his new wife Jen.
Overall, it was the single most perfect weekend we could have possibly dreamed of. We are so thankful to my parents for all the work they put into it, and to our friends and family for being there to celebrate one of the most important days with us!
Okay, okay, enough with the details. On to the pics!!
Mindy helping me get into my dress - the best Maid of Honor I could ask for!
Me and my momma before the wedding
Taking pictures to pass the time while I wait for my daddy
My daddy giving me away! This also made me a little teary
With my parents after the ceremony
With his mom and John after the ceremony
Mindy, my maid of honor, and Tony, his best man
With Carter, our little nephew/Godson/ring bearer
The cake at the restaurant--I can't believe he actually smashed it! (Wait...yes I can...)
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Our Wedding Plans
A lot of people recently have asked questions about our wedding and how we're going about doing this whole justice of the peace thing, how the engagement has worked out, and about our plans for a traditional ceremony and reception in the future.
So here, spelled out, are our wedding plans:
Last year, my soon to be husband and I began seriously talking marriage. We knew it was something we both wanted for our future together, and with him going into the Army we knew we wanted to be married before he left for basic training. While it might be unconventional and take away from the surprise of the "will you marry me" surprise (Are people actually legitimately surprised when their partner proposes? I mean, yes you can/should be surprised by the style/timing of the proposal, but I feel like if you're at the stage for proposing you should have already had lengthy convos about getting married and your future together. So the fact that they are proposing shouldn't be that much of a surprise, right?) we wanted to make sure that we talked and planned things out, discussed how we would raise our family, and make sure that we were on the same page about lots of things. Plus, we wanted to make sure God was at the center of our marriage so we took the time to pray and make room for Him in our lives.
Because of him joining the Army, and the fact that we knew we wanted to be married before he left for basic, we had some things to work around. We knew that with him being in school and me being a first-year teacher and having so many student loans to pay back, we could not save up for a big traditional ceremony and reception before he left. We started talking to other Military couples and reading about how they handled the Army/marriage situation, and we learned that it's actually very common for couples to be married with a justice of the peace before the husband leaves for basic training and then later in the follow year, when he has a chance for leave, to have the big, traditional ceremony and reception with all of their friends and family. After doing a lot of talking with each other and our parents, we determined that this would be the best plan for us.
Even though we have been planning out this wedding situation for almost 8 months, he has not technically proposed yet. We've purchased the rings, but he is waiting for a very specific moment/date to officially pop the question (I still don't know what this date is, but apparently it has some kind of significance to us. I like the surprise of it, and I can't wait to tell everyone the story of how it finally happened!) We consider ourselves to be engaged, and refer to each other as "fiance" when talking to other people, he just hasn't put a ring on it yet ;)
On November 11, 2011, he and I will be married by a justice of the peace at the Cuyahoga County Courthouse with just our parents, maid of honor, and best man in attendance. We want it to be a very intimate ceremony, and that is why we have chosen only a very select few people to be there.
Next year around Christmas, he will be on leave from Army training and will be able to come home to Northeast Ohio. At that time, tentatively on December 29, 2012, we will be holding a traditional ceremony with the full wedding party as well as a large reception. At this time, we will be celebrating our love and marriage with a vow renewal (the traditional ceremony) and reception with all of our friends and family. We are so thankful that even though we won't have all of our friends and family at the justice of the peace ceremony, they will be able to join us for a true celebration the following year!
No, it's not necessarily traditional. No, it's not necessarily the way either of us imagined.
But it works for our circumstances, and it will allow us to be together during times that non-married soldiers would have to spend apart from their loved one while saving up for the traditional ceremony and reception we've always dreamed of.
We both hope that people aren't offended or upset that they won't be a part of our justice of the peace wedding, and that our friends and family will be understanding of our circumstances. We can't wait to celebrate with all of you who have been such an important and supportive part of our lives and relationship together!
So here, spelled out, are our wedding plans:
Last year, my soon to be husband and I began seriously talking marriage. We knew it was something we both wanted for our future together, and with him going into the Army we knew we wanted to be married before he left for basic training. While it might be unconventional and take away from the surprise of the "will you marry me" surprise (Are people actually legitimately surprised when their partner proposes? I mean, yes you can/should be surprised by the style/timing of the proposal, but I feel like if you're at the stage for proposing you should have already had lengthy convos about getting married and your future together. So the fact that they are proposing shouldn't be that much of a surprise, right?) we wanted to make sure that we talked and planned things out, discussed how we would raise our family, and make sure that we were on the same page about lots of things. Plus, we wanted to make sure God was at the center of our marriage so we took the time to pray and make room for Him in our lives.
Because of him joining the Army, and the fact that we knew we wanted to be married before he left for basic, we had some things to work around. We knew that with him being in school and me being a first-year teacher and having so many student loans to pay back, we could not save up for a big traditional ceremony and reception before he left. We started talking to other Military couples and reading about how they handled the Army/marriage situation, and we learned that it's actually very common for couples to be married with a justice of the peace before the husband leaves for basic training and then later in the follow year, when he has a chance for leave, to have the big, traditional ceremony and reception with all of their friends and family. After doing a lot of talking with each other and our parents, we determined that this would be the best plan for us.
Even though we have been planning out this wedding situation for almost 8 months, he has not technically proposed yet. We've purchased the rings, but he is waiting for a very specific moment/date to officially pop the question (I still don't know what this date is, but apparently it has some kind of significance to us. I like the surprise of it, and I can't wait to tell everyone the story of how it finally happened!) We consider ourselves to be engaged, and refer to each other as "fiance" when talking to other people, he just hasn't put a ring on it yet ;)
On November 11, 2011, he and I will be married by a justice of the peace at the Cuyahoga County Courthouse with just our parents, maid of honor, and best man in attendance. We want it to be a very intimate ceremony, and that is why we have chosen only a very select few people to be there.
Next year around Christmas, he will be on leave from Army training and will be able to come home to Northeast Ohio. At that time, tentatively on December 29, 2012, we will be holding a traditional ceremony with the full wedding party as well as a large reception. At this time, we will be celebrating our love and marriage with a vow renewal (the traditional ceremony) and reception with all of our friends and family. We are so thankful that even though we won't have all of our friends and family at the justice of the peace ceremony, they will be able to join us for a true celebration the following year!
No, it's not necessarily traditional. No, it's not necessarily the way either of us imagined.
But it works for our circumstances, and it will allow us to be together during times that non-married soldiers would have to spend apart from their loved one while saving up for the traditional ceremony and reception we've always dreamed of.
We both hope that people aren't offended or upset that they won't be a part of our justice of the peace wedding, and that our friends and family will be understanding of our circumstances. We can't wait to celebrate with all of you who have been such an important and supportive part of our lives and relationship together!
Sunday, September 11, 2011
10 Years
10 years ago...
I was 15 years old, sitting in sophomore English class.
I was innocent and naive.
I never believed that someone would attack the United States.
I assumed we would always be safe.
I was sure that I would never have to see a war in my lifetime, let alone have friends and family fight in it.
10 years ago, I witnessed on TV as a plane flew into the second tower.
I watched a friend cry because her uncle worked in those towers.
10 years ago, I watched our country, I watched the world change.
I didn't know anyone who died in the WTC, and at the time I didn't realize just how big the scope of these events were. Politics aside, I didn't understand the concept of going to war or of sending 18-year-old soldiers to die in a battle, but I understood the concept of protection and of protecting our nation. Today, I understand it without doubt. I have watched this country change in ways I never would have expected, some for the better and some for the worse. And now, 10 years later, I prepare to start a life where my husband will be fighting this war that started because of the events that took place 10 years ago today.
Hearing the names being read out-loud makes the reality of that day come back full-force, and I find myself sitting on the couch watching it and crying. I'll be praying a lot today: praying for God's peace for those who lost loved ones that day and who have lost loved ones in the war since then; praying for the safety of those who continue to fight for our freedom and safety; praying for our nation to rekindle the love and compassion for each other and the the unity that was formed on that day; and praying for God's presence to settle upon our country.
Gone, but never forgotten...
I was 15 years old, sitting in sophomore English class.
I was innocent and naive.
I never believed that someone would attack the United States.
I assumed we would always be safe.
I was sure that I would never have to see a war in my lifetime, let alone have friends and family fight in it.
10 years ago, I witnessed on TV as a plane flew into the second tower.
I watched a friend cry because her uncle worked in those towers.
10 years ago, I watched our country, I watched the world change.
I didn't know anyone who died in the WTC, and at the time I didn't realize just how big the scope of these events were. Politics aside, I didn't understand the concept of going to war or of sending 18-year-old soldiers to die in a battle, but I understood the concept of protection and of protecting our nation. Today, I understand it without doubt. I have watched this country change in ways I never would have expected, some for the better and some for the worse. And now, 10 years later, I prepare to start a life where my husband will be fighting this war that started because of the events that took place 10 years ago today.
Hearing the names being read out-loud makes the reality of that day come back full-force, and I find myself sitting on the couch watching it and crying. I'll be praying a lot today: praying for God's peace for those who lost loved ones that day and who have lost loved ones in the war since then; praying for the safety of those who continue to fight for our freedom and safety; praying for our nation to rekindle the love and compassion for each other and the the unity that was formed on that day; and praying for God's presence to settle upon our country.
Gone, but never forgotten...
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Overwhelmed?
People always talk about how overwhelmed they are. Heck, I always talk about how overwhelmed I am! Overwhelmed with paying bills, with getting things done all in one day, with cleaning the house, with work, with family, with H--there's always something to overwhelm me, and I almost always mean it in a bad way.
Okay, maybe "bad" isn't the word I'm looking for. But 9 times out of 10, when people say "overwhelmed" they mean it in a way that isn't necessarily a good thing. Think about it. How many times have you said "ugh, I'm so overwhelmed with ______ right now!" There are those rare occasions where we say "oh my gosh, I'm so overwhelmed with joy/thankfulness/gratefulness/whatever!" But let's be honest---how often does that happen? A baby shower, a wedding shower, a wedding, a surprise party....if you're like me, that's maybe once a year...maybe.
Why can't we be more overwhelmed by good feelings and good things? Lately, I've been realizing, even when we aren't sure how we're going to pay the bills or we're struggling for something, I realize that in general, H and I are pretty blessed. God has done some amazing things for us this past year, and I know that our relationship is as strong as it is because of His blessings and love. When money is tight, somehow everything seems to work out. When life seems stressful, we realize that we have each other to rely on for support and comfort. Even the simplest little things, like laying in bed laughing at stupid jokes, is a blessing---having that perfect someone who gets you. These are the good things that I want to be overwhelmed by!
H and I are very blessed, even on the days we don't realize it. I want to be overwhelmed by the good things: the small blessings, the love, the happiness, the laughter. I want to be overwhelmed with too many true friends, with family who cares, with being in love. These are the good things that we need to remember to let ourselves become overwhelmed by! So I'm challenging myself to focus on the good overwhelmment (Is this a word? Probably not--but I'm using it anyway!) instead of the bad---I think life will look pretty great from here on out! :)
Okay, maybe "bad" isn't the word I'm looking for. But 9 times out of 10, when people say "overwhelmed" they mean it in a way that isn't necessarily a good thing. Think about it. How many times have you said "ugh, I'm so overwhelmed with ______ right now!" There are those rare occasions where we say "oh my gosh, I'm so overwhelmed with joy/thankfulness/gratefulness/whatever!" But let's be honest---how often does that happen? A baby shower, a wedding shower, a wedding, a surprise party....if you're like me, that's maybe once a year...maybe.
Why can't we be more overwhelmed by good feelings and good things? Lately, I've been realizing, even when we aren't sure how we're going to pay the bills or we're struggling for something, I realize that in general, H and I are pretty blessed. God has done some amazing things for us this past year, and I know that our relationship is as strong as it is because of His blessings and love. When money is tight, somehow everything seems to work out. When life seems stressful, we realize that we have each other to rely on for support and comfort. Even the simplest little things, like laying in bed laughing at stupid jokes, is a blessing---having that perfect someone who gets you. These are the good things that I want to be overwhelmed by!
H and I are very blessed, even on the days we don't realize it. I want to be overwhelmed by the good things: the small blessings, the love, the happiness, the laughter. I want to be overwhelmed with too many true friends, with family who cares, with being in love. These are the good things that we need to remember to let ourselves become overwhelmed by! So I'm challenging myself to focus on the good overwhelmment (Is this a word? Probably not--but I'm using it anyway!) instead of the bad---I think life will look pretty great from here on out! :)
Thursday, August 11, 2011
262 Days.
That's how many days until my then-husband leaves for the Army. That's how many nights I have left to curl up next to him and fall asleep. That's how many mornings I get to wake up before him and make breakfast, then climb back into bed and cuddle for just a few more minutes. That's one Thanksgiving, one Christmas, one New Years, one Valentine's Day, and one birthday. 262 days.
March seems so far away. Forever away. But I know that time is going to fly, and I need to hold on to every minute between now and then. We have our wedding to look forward to, we have 262 more days together to watch our nephew grow up, and so many little things to treasure in the first 4 months of our marriage.
Thank God for support systems, friends and family, and a strong faith in God's plan for our lives. That's what's going to get us through the next 262 days (and then some)
March seems so far away. Forever away. But I know that time is going to fly, and I need to hold on to every minute between now and then. We have our wedding to look forward to, we have 262 more days together to watch our nephew grow up, and so many little things to treasure in the first 4 months of our marriage.
Thank God for support systems, friends and family, and a strong faith in God's plan for our lives. That's what's going to get us through the next 262 days (and then some)
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Photo Dump: Carter Comes to Play!
My little monkey with his little monkey
Lots of smiles for Aunt Melissa!
Boy time. The look on their faces says it all.
Godparents <3
Worn out after a long day of playing :)
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Updates and Giveaways
Well hello there. It's been a while since I've updated, simply because nothing that exciting has been going on around here. Last week, the "snowpocalypse" hit us, and I had snow days on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. It was so wonderful to sit around the apartment with H and having some free time to just relax and hangout together. I know that having 3 days off last week, then one day of work, and then 2 days off (for the weekend) is going to make having 5 consecutive days of teaching seem like forever! But I just keep telling myself that it's only a few months until summer and then I can enjoy vacation and starting grad school!
My application for grad school is all in, and now it's a waiting game. I don't know if the director of the special education graduate program will call me in for an interview or not, but I'm excited for hopefully being able to start the program this summer! Yay for new adventures.
Other than that, not much else is going on. Have to get my bumper fixed after getting in a fight with a mound of frozen snow/ice. Thank goodness for insurance! My sister and nephew are doing great. She's adjusting to being a new mom, and he's healthy and happy (and incredibly lovable and handsome!!). She's going back to school at the end of the month, but she's had a tutor coming to the house almost every day and she's doing better with school now than she was before she had Carter. Hopefully, the family will be coming up to visit the last weekend in February so I can see them all.
Oh! And if you're looking for some free stuff, go check out the giveaway my friend from high school is doing on her blog: Our Little LIfesicle
Kaleigh is a wonderful woman, wife, and mother, and while you're there reading and entering the giveaway, make sure to vote for her blog (click the brown banner at the bottom of any post and vote!)
My application for grad school is all in, and now it's a waiting game. I don't know if the director of the special education graduate program will call me in for an interview or not, but I'm excited for hopefully being able to start the program this summer! Yay for new adventures.
Other than that, not much else is going on. Have to get my bumper fixed after getting in a fight with a mound of frozen snow/ice. Thank goodness for insurance! My sister and nephew are doing great. She's adjusting to being a new mom, and he's healthy and happy (and incredibly lovable and handsome!!). She's going back to school at the end of the month, but she's had a tutor coming to the house almost every day and she's doing better with school now than she was before she had Carter. Hopefully, the family will be coming up to visit the last weekend in February so I can see them all.
Oh! And if you're looking for some free stuff, go check out the giveaway my friend from high school is doing on her blog: Our Little LIfesicle
Kaleigh is a wonderful woman, wife, and mother, and while you're there reading and entering the giveaway, make sure to vote for her blog (click the brown banner at the bottom of any post and vote!)
Monday, January 24, 2011
Holding On
This weekend, a friend from high school lost her fiance, only a few months before the wedding. I'm beyond heartbroken for her, and can only send my thoughts and prayers her way right now. Words can't express how much sorrow I have for any woman in this kind of situation.
It was a shock to me. They were both my age, in their mid-20's, and about to start their life together. The idea of death was probably the last thing on their minds. And yet it happened.
What would I do?
What would I do if H died tomorrow? How would I handle it? How could I possibly, at 24, plan a funeral for a man who I imagined I would grow old with? How could I say goodbye to the only future I can see myself in? My world would come crashing down, and I would have no idea what to do next.
I'll admit it--I take things for granted. I don't think or worry about the fact that H, or anyone I love and hold close, could die tomorrow. I don't worry about losing my job. I don't concern myself with the fear of not having a roof over my head, food in my cupboards, or clothing on my body...but what if the house burned down? I take these things for granted every day, and reading that a friend my age has had a loss like this at such a young age has really been a wake-up call. I need to stop taking things for granted, remember my blessings, and thank God each morning for granting me another day on His wonderful creating with the people that I love.
It was a shock to me. They were both my age, in their mid-20's, and about to start their life together. The idea of death was probably the last thing on their minds. And yet it happened.
What would I do?
What would I do if H died tomorrow? How would I handle it? How could I possibly, at 24, plan a funeral for a man who I imagined I would grow old with? How could I say goodbye to the only future I can see myself in? My world would come crashing down, and I would have no idea what to do next.
I'll admit it--I take things for granted. I don't think or worry about the fact that H, or anyone I love and hold close, could die tomorrow. I don't worry about losing my job. I don't concern myself with the fear of not having a roof over my head, food in my cupboards, or clothing on my body...but what if the house burned down? I take these things for granted every day, and reading that a friend my age has had a loss like this at such a young age has really been a wake-up call. I need to stop taking things for granted, remember my blessings, and thank God each morning for granting me another day on His wonderful creating with the people that I love.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Baby Carter!
Carter Dennis
Born at 6:41pm on Wednesday, January 12, 2011.
7lbs 6oz
21 inches
Happy, healthy, and handsome!
Mom and baby are both doing amazing. The birth was healthy and went flawlessly. Mindy was strong and so focused throughout the entire delivery. I am so proud of her, probably more than she'll ever know. Here are just a few pictures:
All cleaned up, right after birth
My handsome little nephew
Momma and baby
Feeding time!
Born at 6:41pm on Wednesday, January 12, 2011.
7lbs 6oz
21 inches
Happy, healthy, and handsome!
Mom and baby are both doing amazing. The birth was healthy and went flawlessly. Mindy was strong and so focused throughout the entire delivery. I am so proud of her, probably more than she'll ever know. Here are just a few pictures:
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Looking Back
I can definitely say that 2010 was a CRAZY year for me! I learned a lot, had some interesting experiences, made a lot of new friends, started a career, and fell in love all over again. Here are some things that I learned this year:
-Trust God no matter what. He knows what He's doing, and in the end He's going to make things work out for you.
-Be patient. Good things come to those who wait.
-Don't be afraid to tell someone how you feel, good or bad, because in the end you have to do what's best for you.
-Love freely. Love who you love, when you love them, for whatever reason you love them. And if you can't stop loving someone, trust that God's got a reason for that.
-Apply for a million jobs until you land the right one.
-Have faith.
-Hold tight to your family, through good and bad. A wise woman once said "We'll get through this. We're a family, and that's what families do."
-Look for the little joys. They are what make life worth living.
-Yell when you need to. Cry if you have to. But don't ever go to bed angry.
-Forgive. Simple to say, hard to do, but essential to getting through life.
-Listen to your instincts/heart/conscience. Chances are they probably know what's going on.
-Say "I'm sorry."
-Find something to be thankful for every single day, even if it's something trivial. You'll be more aware of your blessings if you do this.
-Reconnect with old friends. It's worth it.
-Don't let the little bothers bring you down. It's not worth it.
I love this verse, and I think it completely summarizes 2010 for me:
"When times are good, be happy;
but when times are bad, consider:
God has made the one as well as the other."
-Ecclesiastes 7:14-17
And now it's on to 2011! God's got BIG things in store for us, and I'm so excited to see what's going to happen.
Also, H and I have started a new blog for 2011. It's mostly me doing the updating, but it's to chronicle everything we have going on this coming year. This blog will obviously still be my priority; the other blog is a photo blog--1 picture a day for 365 days.
I pray that God blesses you and your family this coming year! See you in 2011!
-Trust God no matter what. He knows what He's doing, and in the end He's going to make things work out for you.
-Be patient. Good things come to those who wait.
-Don't be afraid to tell someone how you feel, good or bad, because in the end you have to do what's best for you.
-Love freely. Love who you love, when you love them, for whatever reason you love them. And if you can't stop loving someone, trust that God's got a reason for that.
-Apply for a million jobs until you land the right one.
-Have faith.
-Hold tight to your family, through good and bad. A wise woman once said "We'll get through this. We're a family, and that's what families do."
-Look for the little joys. They are what make life worth living.
-Yell when you need to. Cry if you have to. But don't ever go to bed angry.
-Forgive. Simple to say, hard to do, but essential to getting through life.
-Listen to your instincts/heart/conscience. Chances are they probably know what's going on.
-Say "I'm sorry."
-Find something to be thankful for every single day, even if it's something trivial. You'll be more aware of your blessings if you do this.
-Reconnect with old friends. It's worth it.
-Don't let the little bothers bring you down. It's not worth it.
I love this verse, and I think it completely summarizes 2010 for me:
"When times are good, be happy;
but when times are bad, consider:
God has made the one as well as the other."
-Ecclesiastes 7:14-17
And now it's on to 2011! God's got BIG things in store for us, and I'm so excited to see what's going to happen.
Also, H and I have started a new blog for 2011. It's mostly me doing the updating, but it's to chronicle everything we have going on this coming year. This blog will obviously still be my priority; the other blog is a photo blog--1 picture a day for 365 days.
I pray that God blesses you and your family this coming year! See you in 2011!
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
I'm Thankful For...
-An amazing family who is supportive and loving
-A future husband who loves me more than words can express
-A soon-to-be-born nephew/Godson who will grow up knowing how strong his mother is and how much he is loved
-A job (even if it's not perfect)
-A working car
-An apartment that is nice with cheap rent and free utilities/cable/internet
(I'll keep adding to the list as the week goes on)
-A future husband who loves me more than words can express
-A soon-to-be-born nephew/Godson who will grow up knowing how strong his mother is and how much he is loved
-A job (even if it's not perfect)
-A working car
-An apartment that is nice with cheap rent and free utilities/cable/internet
(I'll keep adding to the list as the week goes on)
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